Love Yourself Through The Trauma

Valentine's Day. Love for myself. Love for the world. Yesterday (2/13) by all accounts should have been a very difficult & emotional day for me, as it was the anniversary of my sexual assault. What took me months to even come to terms with the fact it happened, what took my trust, my passion for running, and at one point almost my desire for life - all at the hands of someone I once believed to be my best friend.
Yes, yesterday should have been an emotional time, yet here I stand. Here I am. I am happy. I am strong. I am HERE. I have regained a love for running and the security to do so and feel comfortable. I have stopped crying myself to sleep at night. I have surrounded myself with communities who have motivated me to grow and have shown me that love and trust can help to heal, that fitness can pull you out of your darkest times & that community can help reinstill trust & mend what once felt torn apart.
Yesterday, should have been a difficult day; however, I have never been happier. God has surrounded my with not one but SEVERAL encouraging and empowering and loving and inspiring people and communities.
It took me awhile to come to terms with what happened. It took me a long time to make sense of it and work through it. But through it all, I made it through. I survived.
And here we are on Valentine's Day 2018 - the day after that anniversary of one of the hardest times in my life and I have never felt more love, more loved and more loving energy in my life than I do now.

This will be my last post before my surgery on Friday. Going forward, I hope to make this a weekly blog focusing on my recovery and the process of getting back to & better than I am now with my fitness regimen.